Random

I recently began writing more often, sometimes because I'm bored, but also because it's therapeutic. I've been recovering from some procedure or other for the past few years and have lost interest or ability in most activities I used to enjoy. I continue write 'til the wee hours, totally relaxed, listening to music of all sorts, lost in thought. Sometimes I share on Facebook in the moment, but next morning, 1st thing... "Ok, now what did you post last night?" Delete.

I play games or watch YouTube videos and only do what's absolutely necessary. I don't watch much TV, but when I do, it's a travel or culinary channel. I manage to keep most appointments but often reschedule.  I look forward to empty days, but once I'm out, I'm fine. It's like prying me out of a packed sardine can. 

The Dreams. Recently, I get flashbacks during the day of dreams which I usually forget within hours. I see them often, repeatedly and weeks later. Often it's visual, just a flash of a moment or location, or an emotion, but I remember them, and they keep coming back. I have quite a collection now. odd

I also had another Visitation Dream, the 2nd in the past year. This wasn't as vivid, but there was a presence. I don't believe it, but perhaps there's something on the other side. hope.  AI: "Unlike regular dreams that feel foggy or fragmented, visitation dreams possess remarkable clarity and coherence. The experience unfolds with a crystal-clear quality, each moment vivid, purposeful and feels  tangible, as though you were truly present. There's often a clear storyline, unlike the scattered nature of typical dreams. This clarity reflects the sacred nature of these encounters and their vividness of these dreams makes them easy to recall in detail, even years later".

Although I hold onto these dreams, memories in general are totally useless. "take comfort in your memories". No, never. Longing overpowers all. I have vivid memories of past loves, lives, travels, kids but take no comfort in them and tear up when I'm alone or driving. I make vague attempts to be useful, but general chores, even watering my plants  (actually 1 plant) is a chore. 

I always fancied myself a country woman. All my life, no matter where I lived, small town, country, on the road or big city, I valued a life of self-sufficiency, not buying into the life of fast food, prepared meals, pre-made everything, processed edibles. Oh I've broken that rule more times than I'd like to admit, but keep trying.

I love baking bread...

hanging out laundry

making soap

gardening fail...rocks

canning the fall harvest 

living off-grid 

I have so many places I want to explore, making the most of the unknown time I have left, but I'm too timid to leave the house alone unless I have to. I find it impossible to visit a shop I've never been to or eat alone at a restaurant, even a diner, so drive-thru is the only option for now. I bought new hiking boots and trekking poles. The Little Conestoga Creek in literally in my back yard, but I've never walked back there, even after almost 4 years! Last fall, full of hope, I bought new clothes, shoes, a renewing, but they're mostly in my closet, unworn. I have never been alone and hate it. I'm such a chatterbox, love to share when out and about. Otherwise, why bother?

I manage to go to PT or MAG (Medically Adaptive Gym) a couple times a week, unless I oversleep or find some other excuse not to go, but I keep medical appointments most of the time. Although I've fixed my joints and back, I'm now dealing with anemia, low iron, vitamin D and B12, so there's that. With treatment of iron infusions and vitamins, I'll break away from this lethargy and be good to go soon. Physically, I'm all fixed.

My sewing days are over, so I'm selling my vintage Singer Slant Needle sewing machine and cabinet. It has a gaggle of attachments including button-holer, pleater, ruffler and more. It belonged to my Aunt Ann, who was an excellent tailor, making most of her own dresses and coats that looked like fine designer clothes. I'll keep a smaller portable Brother quilting machine. 

 

As I write this, Benny and the Jets plays, the iconic song blasted through a window at Kiester Rd Apts in Slippery Rock the summer of 1973. Dancing in the streets, joy everywhere.

Random: I counted 22 friends on Facebook who are no longer with us. Is this sounding dreadful? It is...

In a few months, I'll be navigating to California to support Carla and her fiancé in marriage June 13, 2026 in Visalia CA. In other words, I'm walking her down the aisle but not "giving" her away. During that time, I'll be out of my comfort zone, but I've never been to the west coast or seen the Pacific, so I'll manage. 

Why California? When we first moved to NYC Gateway Towers, Manhattan NY, we met Wade and Laura, and Carla was hired to nanny their 2 small children when she was 15. They have been lifelong friends ever since. They sublet their Manhattan apartment, bought a house in Visalia CA and offered to host wedding festivities. After looking at venues nearby, she decided to take them up on their offer. I'm nervous as a whore in church to leave my comfort zone, but excited to send her off in into a magical future. That's all folks, til we meet again.

l

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Abromovic and Ulay

”Let’s walk towards each other and let’s say goodbye.” Legendary performance artists and former couple Marina Abramović and Ulay (1943-2020) discuss their final joint performance.

After many years of collaborating in life and art, Marina Abramović and Ulay decided to end their relationship and collaboration in 1988 with one final performance piece: The Great Wall Walk. The two walked the Great Wall of China, one from the East end of the wall, the other from the West, meeting halfway: ”This was probably the most dramatic goodbye,” Marina Abramović says. “We met one day before, and we didn’t talk. We only said good luck,” Ulay recalls. “Our greatest wish was to walk, to move.” Walking over 2000 km with no prior training took a toll on the body, but “once you get the strength, you understand the beauty of nature,” Marina Abramović says, Ulay agreeing: “I got so in tune with the Earth, with my body, which was a great sensation.” Finally meeting each other meant closing the chapter of not only their relationship but also working together as artists: “This was so painful, the whole thing,” Abramović explains: “Saying goodbye is saying goodbye to our collaboration work, and you find yourself in a kind of emptiness.” Both went their separate ways: “When we split, it was like a person had died,” Ulay says. The couple famously reunited at Marina Abramović’s performance The Artist is Present at MoMA in 2010.

White Canvas

 

Fluid Music Page

I'll often share something deeply moving or beautiful on Facebook, and end up deleting it the next day. But this blog is my own, and even if no one reads this, I'll update often because I love late night listenin', so check back occasionally.  

If you've never heard of Rosie Malone, now you have. 

Feb 23, 2026

When it comes to favorites, this is ALWAYS at the top of the list. It's on my dead playlist.

 Brilliant composition. 

                                                                   stunning choreoraphy

Feb 26 2026 Otta Orchestra

Mama Cass

Jon Baptiste

                                                              https://youtube.com/shorts/j2lot-W_1NA?si=T6AmbGR6H44Bv7jz

Fasnacht Crawl

Today is Shrove Tuesday, also known as Fat Tuesday, the day all good Pennsylvania Dutch Amish and Mennonites divest themselves of rich ingredients, such as eggs, lard, butter, and sugar before the Lenten fast begins on Ash Wednesday.

These ingredients are combined to make  a square dense pastry called Fasnachts (Fast Night). I remember Fasnacht Day in the 60's when I lived in Chambersburg, PA, which has a large Mennonite community. I've traveled the country, experiencing local cuisines and traditions, but never encountered fasnachts, even in Amish locales. It's truly a Pennsylvania Dutch tradition. Enough about history, but if your heart desires more about this tradition, read all about it: Fasnacht Day.

So we arose somewhat early this morning to start our day (I admit we could have started sooner but...) in our search  for the most authentic fasnacht. Well, Lancaster PA is the heart of Pennsylvania Dutch country, so we had ample choices to find the "real thing". 

Our first stop was Achenbach Bakery.

We spent way too much time and money there, but everything beckoned to our senses, and we didn't resist. 

Ooh gooey goodness!

We ended up sitting at a table to stuff our faces before heading off to the next place of sin.

Our next stop was W Donuts. cozy place, pricey but extraordinary!

We stopped for lunch to eat "real" food, Akron PA

 
                                                   

We visited Bunyaad Fair Trade Rugs and Marketplace.

 

Superb Quilling

Seasonal herbs and spices

Exquisite quilling. I'm just a novice, inspiration.

Unfortunately, we didn't crawl to any more bakeries, 

but we had a 

Wonderful Day!

Holiday Excursions

My body has been riddled with arthritis, so the past few years had gotten progressively worse until I was unable to move freely without pain. I had my 1st joint replacement in 2015 and was good for awhile. After I moved back to PA in 2022, I've had more joints replaced and back surgery. I'm now pain free and just need to get stronger through PT and exercise. I soldiered through every procedure, confident that, even at my age, it was worth it. I know how lucky I am, adding a few more years.

Since I'm getting around better, the holidays held many milestones for me. I never make New Year's resolutions, but this year I vowed to get off my ass. Finally. 

My brother always joins me for Christmas, no matter where I am. Mission TX, Miami FL, wherever. I picked him up from Baltimore airport the past few years. The next day we shopped our feet off at Wegmans, which I haven't done in (a year)? because I can't pull a wheely cart full of groceries...yet. Delivery it is for now.

Another day we shopped at  Roots Market (ding ding ding! prize if you can pronounce it properly). It has many buildings, vendors indoors and out selling fresh produce, baked goods, meat, seafood. There's also a flea market and auction.

so of course we got lost and couldn't find our car, so my brother took the key fob to locate the car while I sat on a bench. A side note: when he used the men's room, he told me there was a Bible in each stall. Contemplative material I suppose. In addition, weekly shopping at Central Market and nearby farm markets provide us with locally grown produce, cheese, flowers, herbs and meats. Grocery stores are  for basics and every year, I look forward to "putting up" for winter as I pressure can seasonal vegetables, fruits, and soup. 

We toured the Hand Mansion at Rockford, decorated for the holidays. 

https://www.historicrockford.org/

On yet another day, we visited Burning Bridge Antique Market in Columbia PA. https://burningbridgeantiques.com/ A plethora of glassware, jewelry, furniture, kitchen items, just about anything.

I've been there before but was physically limited at the time. This time, however, they closed early because an ice storm was heading our way. I'm looking for a few specific items, so I'll be heading back soon. 

Not sure if it's Waterford, but is beautiful.

Hobnail

 

I could swear I have this set in storage! Desert Rose made by Franciscan.

Marcasite

I used to collect vintage colanders.

I had the most unusual Christmas. We decided to not exchange gifts this year. My brother visited from Florida, but daughter Carla had singing gigs and other daughter Nina worked Christmas, so it's just my brother and me until Nina and her boyfriend Carlo joined us later. We had a lovely Christmas meal with good food and company. Christmas isn't about decorating, or baking my brains out, buying the perfect gifts, last minute wrapping while watching the Pope at St Peter's Basilica in the wee hours of Christmas the morning. Gifts don't always come in boxes.